I’m writing this post in an interesting state of mind. I just woke up and am halfway between awake and asleep. This is the state where I find most of my jokes really funny and have no censor on anything I say. Somehow, this is the state that I often write emails to friends from. I usually end up going back to the emails and regretting them or sending an apology email.
Every few months, I wake up because my body won’t let me sleep anymore. The longer I stay in bed, the worse my anxiety for the day gets. I know there are things to do and the pressures and fear seem inescapable. This is a state that I care not to visit often.
I have not experienced a state of peace for a long, long time. I think that some of that is because there is so much riding on my actions to get to Austin that I don’t ever feel that I can rest.
My hope is to find myself in Austin soon in a state of calm joy.
